Many years ago in grade school, I was required to read an academic article on Carole Dweck’s research. I was immediately a fan and went on to write several papers and follow her work. Years later when Angela Duckworth’s book Grit came out, I felt both a twinge of age (what’s old is new again) and enthusiasm for how Dweck’s seminal work from three decades ago was now being leveraged in education.

Dweck’s work came to be a defining influence in my education. It instilled my belief that life is a series of lessons and when we're open to it, there are infinite possibilities to learning and grow. Every professional opportunity has taught me something about myself, the world, and the human experience. Every human I take the time to get to know teaches me something and often makes me a better person.

TBH, I am acutely aware that our circumstances and times that I have a fixed mindset. I have to own that if I am going to overcome it.

I call myself a serial learner, which sounds like a brag, but sometimes is indeed a slippery slope. I've been known to sign up for too many online classes at once or purchase far more books than I can possibly read in a month.

When we are working on projects or jobs we love, we somehow expect it to be fun and fulfilling. It often is, but a lot of the time, it’s not fun. It’s work, it’s hard, and it’s messy. It’s unpredictable.

I know that if I am going to be consistent - at least 80% of the time - I need to set up predictable and efficient routines. I also need to give myself permission to be flexible roughly 20% of the time.

That means I have the same yoga practice two days a week, the same cycling/weight routine two days, and then the other three days, I am flexible. I realize the math doesn't quite add up to 80/20, but there's a perfect opportunity to be flexible! (The reality is, I usually wing it two of those days and take one day off).

While I don't always totally enjoy the workout, it feels good to put energy and attention where I intend to put it. And that is part of the fuel in the predictable, efficient routines.

Even though I know this, I have been struggling to put predictable structures in my morning routine.

I do my best thinking from 6 am until about 11 am. But that time can just slip by, leaving me facing the afternoon and a whole lot of unmet obligations and desires.

It’s been a while since I wrote here, but believe me, I’ve been writing.

I’ve been writing revisions to courses, writing students’ report card comments (it was so fun to fill in for parental leave in a second-grade classroom - with real, healthy humans in the flesh!), and a forthcoming book I am co-authoring.

But the blog was neglected.

Truth be told, I had a major case of pandemic fatigue once my in-person teaching wrapped up. Having been out in the world, I was less than enamored about returning to WFH. I had to work again to find my grove sharing our home and workspace with my family and four furry friends.

And then, winter started to wither away. I was fortunate to be doubled vaxxed and feeling slightly safer getting back into the world. Dr. Lucy McBride’s article in the Washington Post reinforces I am not alone!

I wrote this piece a few weeks back. Since then, I've rewritten a zillion times in my head, scouring for more accurate details, questioning my memory, and maintaining motivation. Ultimately, my perseverating on this one boils down to reminding myself we have all endured hard things. As we slog through the current hard things, our brains are searching for ways to find certainty.

As we settle into the heat of summer and accept the evolving state of affairs, life may feel slightly less chaotic and just plain uncertain. Over the years, I've become accustomed to finding moments of calm amidst the chaos. The past four months have given me plenty of opportunities to practice what I preach - some days with more success than others! As the saying goes, the only constant thing is change!

I am rarely at a loss for words, but lately, it’s become rare that I feel like I have the right words to say. One of my coaching colleagues explained that her approach now is to pause to consider why we are saying what we are saying. Further, we need to carefully consider who will benefit from what we might share.

Our first house was impeccably maintained for fifty years by Mr. Uhle, a sprite, German octogenarian. The house itself structurally sound but the outside blissfully unkempt. He admitted that his wife, who had passed decades earlier, had tended to the yard. He was "reminded of her when the tall heads of the bearded iris sprang up over the carpet of greens." Little did I know we'd carry a bit of Mrs. Uhle with us for 25 years and counting. Nor did I realize that those iris would remind us that we all have what we need to weather change and disruption, even when it feels hard to bloom.

There are some days I have woken up with an intense need to help someone. To feel of service and to feel as if I have some agency over this spinning universe that is presently so uncertain. There are other days, I want to escape, to hide, to shrink because the universe feels, well, so uncertain and vast. Those days, I am not sure what I am in control of nor what is going to feel satisfying or nourishing or helpful.

I hope you are okay. I hope you are feeling more abundance that scarcity. More contentment than anxiety. But if you’re not, I’m thinking of you. Life is hard right now. But nothing is permanent. Things will change.

I want to tell a story about a client, and for obvious reasons, I’m conflating her name and parts of her story. What is very, very true is the strength, determination and warmth she possess. The heart of the story is WHY I coach and why I love, love, love this work.

The other evening, I met a friend for a drink before a meeting we were attending. As I sat down, the bartender said, “How are ya?” To my surprise, I answered, “hah, it’s been a week!” He cocked his head and said, “Oh, really now? You know it’s Tuesday, right?”